Foam Stress-Ball KOs Galloway

Corrupt MP George Galloway has had a bit of a rough ride these past few weeks. He's been knocked out by a foam stress-ball, investigated for assault and is now planning to sue 'The Bill', an ITV police drama series, for not paying him any money.

In April, whilst out campaigning for the Islamonazi 'Respect' party, an onlooker paid all due respect to the self-confessed bullyboy by throwing a Foam stress-ball at him. The ball hit him on the head and knocked the big softy out for 20 minutes. Guilty George eventually came round to the sound of a cheering crowd hailing his assailant, Tim Heald, a hero!

The following week, whilst spewing out his usual predictable diatribe from an open top bus, the odious oaf was jovially heckled ... "I salute your indefatigability — you wan*er" shouted a perceptive bystander. Nazi George was unable to see the funny side however and upon noticing that the heckler was smaller than him, immediately went into hate-filled Islamonazi mode, running down the stairs and violently shoving the innocent man. The police are still investigating.

In his latest escapade, gutless Galloway watched an episode of the Bill in which fictional corrupt MP, Paul Sagger, was investigated for using a soldier's coffin to smuggle stolen goods and drugs into the country. A source close to Mr Galloway said the 'uncanny similarities between him and Sagger were too close to have been an accident'. Galloway intends to sue the programme makers as they did not pay lots of money for their particularly accurate portrayal of him.

Guilty George is a past winner of Mo's 'Turban of Death' award and has also been featured for being a parasitic thief.

U.N. Sponsors 'Bomb-Making' Classes For Kids

The United Nations hung its head in shame today when the headmaster of one of its schools was exposed as being a top bomb maker for a Muslim terror group.

By day, Awad al-Qiq was a respected teacher and headmaster in the Gaza Strip. By night, he built rockets for the Islamonazi cowards of Hamas . For many years the UN has denied Israeli allegations that it supported anti-Israeli terror groups such as Hamas and Hezbollah, preferring instead to accuse Israel of paranoia.

A UN spokesperson today stated that it wasn't aware of Mr al-Qiq's 'out of school' activities, although he failed to deny rumours that Mr al-Qiq included 'bomb making' and 'killing Jews' as hobbies on his CV.

Explosion In Leeds Was Not Caused By Muslim Terrorists

Yes, incredible as it may seem, today's explosion in Leeds was apparently caused by a gas leak and not by our peace loving friends from I Sincerely Love A Massacre (Islam).

Emergency services first cast doubt over whether the explosion was caused by angry Muslims when they realised that no defenceless women or children appeared to have been targetted.

Muhammad Abdul Bari, Chief Nazi at the Muslim Council of Britain, was said to be devastated. "What sort of trickery is this?" he stated when he first heard the news. He then managed to place a positive spin on the incident by claiming that it must have been a sign from Allah and therefore Islam's monopoly on UK terrorism was still in place.

It's Official - Islam is a Fascist Cult Based on the Mad Rantings of a Barbarian

A court in Holland yesterday ruled that Islam could be likened to Fascism.

An Islamonazi group calling itself the Dutch Islamic Federation (DIF) had brought a case against Geert Wilders insisting that the Dutch MP be prevented from exercising his right to freedom of expression. The terrorist supporting group even wanted Wilders to apologise for previous factual comments he had made that Muslims considered to be insulting (are there any other types?).

The judge also stated that it was OK to call Prophet Mohammed (who me?) a Barbarian! - Well, 1400 years stuck in the desert does have an adverse effect on ones social skills.

During the courtcase, not only were the DIF unable to deny that Allah's favourite prophet was a barbarian but they were also unable to deny that Islam consists of beliefs that are in total contradiction to democratic principles of civilised societies.

Copies of Geert Wilders' latest movie 'Fitna' are continually being taken down from youtube.com... the film can however, be seen and also downloaded from here. Watch it while you can!

U.K. Muslim Terrorist Shortage Averted

Britain's 'Muslim friendly' parliamentarians yesterday breathed a huge sigh of relief when they finally succeeded in importing 3 Islamic terrorists from Guantanamo Bay to help replenish the U.K.'s depleted stock. The severe lack of attempted Islamic terrorist atrocities since the failed London and Glasgow bombings in July, led many U.K. policiticians to become concerned that Britain was no longer seen as a safe haven for mad Muslims hell bent on murdering its citizens.

'We must send out the right message' said PM Gordon Brown.

Although none of the terrorists are actually British and none of them even have a right to be here, PM Brown is allowing them to stay on the basis that they once visited this country before going on 'holiday' to that popular (with 'disaffected' Muslim 'men') tourist destination called the Afghanistan War Zone. An Amnesty International spokesperson stated that the 3 terrorists, armed only with a camera (plus a small kalashnikov and several anti-tank RPGs), were inexplicably detained by U.S. forces whilst doing what any Muslim holidaymaker in Afghanistan would do ie trying to kill anybody not wearing a 12" beard or a Niqab.

The 3 Muslim meglomaniacs, Omar Deghayes, Jamil el-Banna and Abdenour Samuer, are now free to roam Britain's streets. Their lawyer, Clive 'I Love Legal Aid' Stafford-Smith, stated 'The human rights of my clients must be respected at all times. They must never be arrested until they have actually carried out the mass murder of civilians that they may, or may not, be planning. To hold somebody against their will purely on the basis that hundreds or thousands of innocent lives will almost certainly be saved is disgraceful'.

Shami Chakrabati, Director of the terrorist defence organisation Liberty, was said to be licking her lips on hearing the terrorists' human rights were bought at the potential expense of innocent blood, once again, flowing freely through Britain's streets.

Always Look on the Bright Side of Death

As part of its 'Bending Over Backwards to Appease Muslims' season, BBC journalist, Yasmeen Khan, has just finished an 'indepth' investigation and concluded that Muslims really do have a sense of humour! No, this isn't a spoof report for Comic Relief she really did come to that conclusion...AND ANYBODY WHO DISAGREES WITH HER WILL DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH!!!!!

The BBC even managed to find a photo of a smiling Muslim (and without a recently beheaded Infidel in sight) ... this, according to Ms Khan, really is proof that Muslims don't just find humour in death, misery and suffering!

Ibrahim Mogra, chairman of the interfaith Muslim Public Affairs Committee (or is that the Muslim Interfaith Public Affairs Committee?) says "religiously there is no reason why Muslims can't enjoy a laugh"... Maybe he'd be kind enough to share this revelation with the rest of the Muslim community.

Muslim 'comic', Jeff Mirza, blames the media for portraying Muslims as 'monolithic' kill-joys incapable of laughing at themselves. When asked if we were ever likely to see an Islamic version of the 'Life of Brian' Mirza stated "No". His answer should not be misinterpreted by Infidels as meaning that Muslims are 'monolithic kill-joys incapable of laughing at themselves.

6 Dead, 100s Injured - Another Productive Day in Palestine

Corrupt dead Muslim terrorist, Yasser Arafat, will be rubbing his hands with glee tonight as many pints of fresh blood were spilt today at a rally organised to commemorate the third anniversary of his death.

Palestinian Fatah supporters hurled stones at the Hamas Terror Police as the rally came to an end in Gaza. Hamas retaliated by bravely shooting into the unarmed crowd despite not having any women to hide behind. Such levels of Islamic heroism haven't been seen since earlier in the day when another brave Hamas unit launched mortars into Israel from a school.

Burkha Bitches Blow Jobs

It was a funny old week last week, lots of things to blog about but I Was feeling a bit lazy and never got round to it. So here's a short recap....

We had a Muslim hairdresser who decided to sue the owner of a trendy salon for not giving her a job. The rather unattractive Bushra Noah had refused to remove her headcovering when cutting hair!...Not sure I'd be too happy sitting in a chair knowing that a covered, politicised Muslim with a sharp implement was standing behind me! The photo is an artist's impression of the hairy hairdresser at work!

Then we had the case of the 'lyrical terrorist'. The first woman in Britain to be found guilty of terrorist related offences. Samina Malik, a 23 year old ex-prostitute, wrote poetry whilst working at W H Smith in Heathrow with titles such as 'How To Behead'. A vast array of terror info was also found hidden under her bed amongst various sex toys. Her father (who is also believed to be her elder brother) is said to be extremely angry with his daughter/sister as he will no longer receive discounted copies of 'Al Qaeda Weekly' from WHS.

Pakistan Bids For Number 1 Terror Spot

Well it's taken a few years but President Pervez Musharraf ensured that Pakistan fell back into line with almost every other Islamic state this weekend when he introduced martial law.

Known as the Second Home of International Terrorism (S.H.I.T.), Pakistan recently came close to taking the number 1 position away from King Abdullah's IslamoNazi Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, when it opened a new wave of Terror Training camps on the Afghanistan border.

Groucho Marx look-a-like, King Abdullah stated "Pakistan would be nothing without Saudi Arabia. 90% of its terrorists are born and bred in Saudi. Without us and our money they would have an Islamo Death Rating of less than 3.2". He went on "They even let some women speak! They should be ashamed of such unIslamic practices?".

One good thing to come out of the Introduction of martial law is that Jew-hating, ex-cricket cheating playboy, Imran Khan has been placed under house arrest...I would suggest that he uses this time wisely to reflect upon the numerous occasions he was caught 'ball-tampering' during his cricketing career against England. His present predicament is obviously a direct result of bad Karma in one's own lifetime.

errr, OK.... it looks like the Jew-hating, ex-cricket cheating playboy, Imran Khan has now escaped from house arrest. We all hope and pray for his safe return so that he may be swiftly executed in true Islamic fashion and can face almighty Allah where he will have to explain his heinous crimes against English cricket.

Ban the Koran

Infidels, do your duty!

Allah feels that all Muslims should now find a new book to read.
He suggests they choose something a little more light-hearted this time.
Click here to sign the petition.

Sainsbury's Sell their Soul to the Devil

Sainsbury's supermarket has succumbed to Islam and publicly stated that its Muslim employees can decide which products they wish to sell.

Apparantly, some Muslim employees are unhappy with their Infidel employers for selling grotesque items such as alchohol and pork based products. Sainsbury's bosses have decided that they daren't risk upsetting the aforementioned employees just in case it leads to worldwide rioting and the murder of innocent women and children as in the global cartoonophobia uprising of february 2006.

A Sainsbury's spokesperson (who wished to remain anonymous) stated "We want all our sensitive Muslim workers to feel at home. This is just a pilot scheme, but if successful, we will also consider giving disobedient female Muslim members of staff the right to be beaten by their male colleagues", he then added "We are currently awaiting delivery of signs asking all Infidel customers not to look at any female Muslim workers. All of us in the boardroom feel this should keep the Muslim community happy until we get round to banning Christmas ".

Inayat Bunglawala, assistant secretary-general of the Terrorist supporting Islamonazi Council of Britain (MCB) said "Alchohol is the drink of the devil. How is one supposed to accurately aim a rocket propelled grenade whilst under the influence of such a drink?".

Muslim Terror Dentist A Danger to Women

Islamonazi dentist Omer Butt (brother of 'former' Islamic extremist Hassan Butt) was today found guilty of trying to bully a non-practicing Muslim lady into wearing a headscarf before he would treat her for toothache at his Bury practice.

Known locally as 'The Butcher of Bury' due to his sadistic interest in the effects of pain on small children and defenceless women, Butt's defence was exposed as a 'tissue of lies' (despite swearing on the Quran) at the General Medical Council (GMC) hearing.

A spokesperson for the GMC (who wished to remain anonymous) stated 'Butt has lied from start to finish during this hearing. His inability to control his sexual urges upon seeing a woman's hair means he is a danger to women...Butt is yet another example of why some Muslim men should not be employed in the NHS.'

The hearing has long been seen as a test case for the NHS . Many Muslim Health workers such as Butt believe that uncovered female patients incite Muslim men to carry out acts of sexual abuse and therefore have a duty to cover themselves up for their own protection. Women, however, state that the onus should be placed on Muslim men to control their sexual urges in the first place.

If you are a Muslim male and need help controlling your sexual urges when confronted with a burkha-free female then please feel free to 'Ask Mo' for advice.

New Quality Mug Range Now Available

A new range of quality mugs is now available from the Prophet Mohammed (PBUM) Official Gift Shop.

The range includes the award winning 'Shariah Law' mug and the new 'Smile if you're proud to be an Islamophobe' mug.

All mugs are 'Muslim friendly' camel urine resistant and also dishwasher safe (although hand washing is recommended due to the strength of some modern Infidel detergents).

All mugs are personally blessed by Allah and therefore guaranteed to bring wealth and good fortune.

Iranian Male Sex Party Gets Out of Hand

Going out for a quick drink and a fumble with his girlfriend seemed like a good idea to 25 year old Saeed Ghanbari from Qazvin, Iran. Unfortunately, the 'Religious' police had other ideas and young Saeed was duly lashed 80 times infront of a crowd of more than 1000 men.

The event was so popular that barricades and armed guards were required as many tried climbing traffic lights for a better view. Dozens recorded the entertainment on their mobile phones as 2 police officers enthusiastically carried out their religious duties.

A local Imam stated that 'drinking and having sex outside of marriage was a serious crime. Had it been a minor offence such as killing his sister for overcooking the rice then a telling-off would have been sufficient'.

Earlier this year, a man was flogged after a copy of the Bible was found in his car. In another case a woman who had been forced into prostitution as an eight-year-old received 99 lashes for 'acts contrary to chastity'.

One of the county's top religious leaders stated 'The West is always quick to condemn Islam as a barbaric and backward religion. Personally, I don't know what all the fuss is about. Most Muslim men would pay a weeks wages to be held down and whipped by a couple of guys wearing masks...I know I would'.

Happy Birthday! Here's to Another 60 Years of Self-Inflicted Poverty!

Pakistan celebrates 60 years of Islamic terrorism this week. Having gained independence from India in 1947 the country has been a role model for Islamic states worldwide ever since. Murder, rape, corruption and almost every human rights abuse known to mankind has helped Pakistan become recognised as a state that really does follow the true principles of Islam.

Whereas India has one of the fastest growing economies in the world, Pakistan's main export is death and misery via its state sponsored terrorist training camps in the northern border region.

An attempt had been made by the West to introduce a thing called 'fun' into Pakistani society but Mad Mullahs quickly pointed out that this was a totally unIslamic concept and would therefore not be tolerated. "The West is evil..." said one such Mullah, "...these dogs think they can turn peaceful and tolerant Muslims away from the glory of killing but they underestimate how easy it is for people like me to manipulate them".

To celebrate the 60th birthday it has been decided by the country's religious leaders to throw a big party. Although laughter will be strictly forbidden, hysterical displays of satisfaction will be permitted on completion of the main event...the main event being the stoning to death of several women who allowed themselves to be raped...coincidentally, these will also be the only women allowed to attend the celebrations... "Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar" uttered the 'dumb', one-handed thief as he feasted on yesterday's leftover cockroach...isn't he just!

Britain Running Out of Muslim Terrorists

It would appear that the U.K. may be running out of Muslim terrorists. In an attempt to avoid such a devastating catastrophe the Government has urgently requested the immediate return of 5 Islamic terrorists currently held in Guantanamo Bay. Although none of the 5 are U.K. citizens, Prime Minister Gordon Brown feels that a lack of Islamic terrorists in Britain would quickly lead to a shortage of suitable role models for young Muslims receiving benefits from the country they hate. Despite all 5 having undeniable terrorist links each of them has been able to convince naive liberals at groups such as 'Amnesty' and 'Liberty' of their innocence.

OMAR DEGHAYES - Was actually caught on film at a Muslim Terror camp but claimed 'mistaken identity' when detained fleeing Afghanistan after the fall of the Taleban.

SHAKER ABDUR-RAHEEM AAMER - Claimed he was merely carrying out 'voluntary charity work' in Afghanistan.

ABDULNOUR SAMEUR - Wounded in Afghanistan (where he had travelled to be a 'good' muslim) whilst fighting alongside a group of Arabs. Also admitted prior knowledge of 9/11.

JAMIL EL-BANNA - Has links to imprisoned radical Muslim cleric Abu Qatada.

BINYAM MOHAMMED AL HABASHI - Received firearms and explosives training in Afghanistan with shoe-bomber Richard Reid.

It must be dificult being a Muslim these days. Just because you carry an AK47 and several hand grenades everybody thinks you're a terrorist!!!...Thank Allah for 'Amnesty International' and 'Liberty'.

Hamas Murders More Children

In an effort to avoid the 'embarrassment' of murdering even more of their own children, Palestinian terrorists have today been allowed by their religious leaders to spend a little less time slavishly reciting quranic hate verses at prayer time in order to spend more time studying the instructions for firing portable rockets.

The 'Religious' order comes after a terrorist attempt earlier today, aimed at scuppering Israel/Palestine peace moves, resulted in the death of an 8 year old Palestinian boy and his younger sister when several rockets fell short of their proposed Israeli target and landed in Northern Gaza instead. Souces in the area said 'This is not an unusual occurrence'

This latest Islamic 'own goal' has been described as Hamas' worst 'miscalculation' since they murdered 8 Palestinians in the now infamous 'Gaza Beach Massacre'.

Hamas' spokesperson was said to be 'unavailable' for comment.

Barbecued Muslim Leaves Earth

Well, Paradise has another mouth to feed tonight after failed terrorist, Kafeel Ahmed, died in hospital from the injuries he received whilst being a very naughty Muslim at Glasgow airport.

There was, however, one very happy lady tonight and that was Layla, AKA virgin number 1 (of 72). Layla, one of Paradise's most experienced virgins, was considered a bit of a beauty in her day. Time may not have been too kind to her but she is still considered to be excellent value for money. As Layla pointed out..."It's not easy working as a virgin in Paradise as almost all of my clients have several major body parts missing. That's why I can't wait to 'welcome' Kafeel...he may have the skin texture of BBQ'd pig but at least he'll be able to make his own breakfast in the morning!".

Layla's caring nature has made her one of Allah's favourite virgins. After 38 years of attentive service beyond the call of duty, Layla only has another 1,253 suicide bombers to satisfy before she is due for automatic retirement.

Planes, Flames and Naughty M.P.s

Well it's been a funny few weeks for Muslims. First they try to blow up hundreds of people in London for taking part in the un-Islamic activity of having fun...and then they try to scare everybody to death at Glasgow airport by setting fire to themselves. These people really are stupid...didn't they realise if they'd have done it on November 5th they could have raised loads of money by having a 'Penny for the Guy' collection!

It's over 100 degrees, the sun's beating down and you're in Iran....Yes, it must be time to send the Religious Police out to make sure that all women are covered from head to toe in black. And all because Muslim men can't control their sexual urges. Who ever said Islam was a backward religion that discriminates against women?

And now for the feel-good factor.... Part time M.P. and ex-holder of the coveted 'Turban of Death' award, George Galloway, has been found guilty (again) of stealing money from the Iraqi 'oil for food' programme by yet another independent investigation. The embarrassing bully boy of British politics looked guiltier than a Muslim attending Alchoholics Anonymous as he launched into a desperate attack on those that exposed him. Although the corrupt M.P. cannot produce any accounts for his 'Mariam Appeal' to prove he isn't a thief, he is adamant he has nothing to hide! "My dog ate them one evening whilst I was watching re-runs of Celebrity Big Brother" ...said the socialist millionaire.